Week Two – Observation Questions for Contemplation

Begin by observing the relationship standards around you. What are the standards for meeting people in your environment? What are the rules for relationships you or the people around you are already in? What are the relationship expectations of the world around you?

What is the underlying rule of the dynamic you are observing? Is it contrary to the approach I’m discussing in this program? If it’s not contrary, you can continue your contemplations, but when you find a rule that is contrary to your process here, write it down and continue with the questions.

The only reason we do anything is that—at some level of our life—it works. We may not understand it but everything we do is for better outcomes, even if it is dysfunctional. What reason is there for either you or the people around you to follow this rule? Is it working for you? What benefit does it give you?

If you are not happy with the approach or if it is not producing the results te want, is there another way you can gain the same benefit? Is there another area in your life or another approach that can give you the same benefit? If you can’t think of anything right now, that’s okay. We’re just observing, realizing what’s important to us and why.

Continue to return to the questions throughout the week. Begin with the first question of observation. Be sure to go through each question with each observation. As you discover the motivation for why you follow relationship patterns, as you discover what you gain, make a list in your journal of the things you value. You don’t need to do anything with them. Just become aware and enter them in your journal.

Again, I suggest staying in practice for as long as you need it. This first lesson is all about having a clear understanding of where we stand now. It’s important to set a strong foundation for the work. I suggest a week at least with each topic but do what feels right for you. Each person is unique. As you feel ready, you can begin the next topic.

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